fotosypalabras

long long time since i've been here... njoi! ;-) h

Reo Matsumoto - The Japanese Beatboxer does dubstep from desertkhaat on Vimeo.

i fell in love
 with words on a page
phrases sentences
paragraphs
made me
want
to kiss
the boy between-& in the
lines
the cheeks on the head that shaped the
thoughts
behind the words...
such
a sensitivity- i want to meet the
author
but
i have nothing to offer
and
sensitivity is
not
a person
a book is not
the universe that is a
human being
so
even if i could
would i
be
frightened
disappointed
would i
hide
only platitudes
stumbling clumsily
from stiff
lips?

she says:  i love people with passion...who have a passion for something in their lives


and i wonder,
i am become
wan
thin
in
(though inflating right before)

her eyes


"where has the passion gone?"

cliche the question
but has its merit

leaves in fall

fall

the fervour of summer & colours

spent

desiccated

insubstantial

subdued....

they
descend

some in a last dying blaze

many simply attired  to meet their analogously robed

destination:

brown to brown earth.

and so....

i think of the leaves, not yet fallen,
but whose time will come

i think of the leaves,

dropping

now dulled

consumed

am i one with them,

falling

depleted
faded?

i cannot say.

the fires are no longer external:

i show the world nothing.

muted exteriors

masking

what need be only for oneself

my passion?

 what a word.
abused
     filled with
an extroversion
    unrelated
to its truth...

my passion?

my passion is

mine

mine to keep
to
hold
for myself
to
nurture
in
secrecy
to
gently

stoke

its dying
embers

precariously glowing

to give it

hope

Come, thou day in night,

it doesn't matter anyway...it's all pointless....

so a world "that just randomly came to exist without any clear meaning" is not a world worth saving?

If this came out of someone else, would this not strike you as draconian, ungenerous, & unkind?

what about justice & kindness? are those not worth all effort?

or is the sheer beauty of the planet upon which we live --& are entrusted with by future generations-- not worth preserving?

how do you define clear meaning?

what clear meaning do you ask of the world in which you yourself randomly happen to appear in?

what meaning should the world ask of you?

Would the spiderweb you admire so cease to be wondrous if a supernatural being is not involved in its creation?

Are cherry blossoms any less beautiful or a sunset less amazing because there is no god?

My sense of wonder is not dimmed because of my atheism.

It is increased manifold when i see the beauty of a face or hand or an entire person because i understand how the outcome could have been different. That so many genetic diseases could have happened...and didn't....

I don't ask the world to have meaning or what the meaning of my life is---always a pet peeve of mine, that question-- i accept it on its terms & do my best in my flawed way within its strictures....

i see

not stars in your eyes

or the

scent of

PERFECTION

screeching

vulgar
untrue

i smell quiet warmth
living
in dark eyes
dark hair

a smile here
a remark
there

unforgettable

an interstice
perfect
in the moment

simple.


that is all.

but all the beauty in the universe
exists
in this.